


When we’re out for dinner we’re cussing like sailors

by AgapantoBlu



Category: DCU (Comics), Midnighter (Comics), Midnighter and Apollo (Comics), The Authority
Genre: For some reason Jenny is still a baby here don't question it, Gen, I don't know how to tag this, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Minor Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-25 12:53:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22296283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgapantoBlu/pseuds/AgapantoBlu
Summary: “I don't want you to get involved!”“Well, that’s too bad becausemy fist's just about to get involved with that asshole's chin!”“Your fist—,” Apollo tried to point out gently, “—is currently broken in three different places. Please, keep out of the brawl.”[Tony, as Midnighter's self proclaimed Best Friend Forever, has the God-given right to punch Prometheus' face in if he ever runs into him.Midnighter disagrees.]
Relationships: Apollo/Midnighter, Midnighter & Tony (Midnighter)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 43





	When we’re out for dinner we’re cussing like sailors

**Author's Note:**

> Tony deserves more recognition as the only non-superpowered friend M managed to make without sleeping with him first, back when he was broken with Apollo.
> 
> Also, this Ace doesn't know how to write sex, hence the _tastefully shadowed_ sex scenes. 
> 
> Canon exists for me to take a disinterested look at and wave away as I keep weaving my own.

“I DON’T WANT YOU TO GET INVOLVED!”

“Well, that’s too bad because _MY FIST’S JUST ABOUT TO GET INVOLVED WITH THAT ASSHOLE’S CHIN_!”

“Your fist—,” Apollo tried to point out gently, “—is currently broken in three different places. Please, keep out of the brawl.”

“There’s no brawl here,” Midnighter growled, and he punched Prometheus’ head into the floor. The man was already unconscious, but he kicked him once more for good measure. He opened a Door under his body, and watched it sink into a cell aboard of the Carrier. He would take care of him later. “No more brawling here. Ever.”

Matt cut off the recording of his phone before arching a brow. “But then you’d have to find another bar to go to.”

Midnighter glared at him, but didn’t reply. Instead, he stalked to where Apollo was standing, hip leaning against the table and arms crossed over his chest as he surveyed the one occupied chair with a soft look on his face. Sitting crookedly like an uneven stool, Tony cradled his broken arm and spat in the direction of Prometheus’ feet.

“You’re going to have to clean that, you know it?”

“Hey,” Tony sniffed, indignantly. “I wasn’t about to let that stinky bag of dicks go.”

“No, indeed,” Midnighter scoffed. “You were about to get your brain splattered on the wall, though!”

“Nah, dude, I knew you were going to save me. You’re my man.”

Apollo let out a short bark of laughter. He covered his mouth with a hand immediately after, but that didn’t spare him a glare of his own from his husband. “Hey, at least he trusts you.”

“Damn right I do!” With his least injured arm, Tony slapped an open palm on Midnighter’s left pectoral, leaning dangerously forward as he did so. Apollo caught him and righted him back against the chair again. “This my bro right here.“

Midnighter blinked once, then looked at Matt. “Head hits?”

“Several,” Matt replied, unconcerned. He was staring at his phone, and a rapid scan of the reflection in his eyes told the computer that he was typing an article on the fight on a doc file titled, _If I ever get into the Daily Planet_. “I made a bet with Dave about concussions.”

“Thank you. Very helpful. Much appreciated.”

Matt peeked above the phone to smirk at him. “What do you want, M? I called you and waited by the side like a good boy. He’s the one who grabbed a pool stick and attacked your traitorous ex. Pretty sure he yelled something about defending your honour too, but I’ll have to rewatch the video I took to give you the exact quote.”

Apollo coed. Midnighter closed his eyes and wondered what the fuck had he done to deserve this. 

The computer beeped about how the chances of Tony attacking Prometheus would have been 0.00003% had he not befriended the man. That was a worryingly high percentage, all considered.

“Alright, that’s it.” He bent down to grab Tony’s arm and put it around his shoulders. “You’re coming over to the Carrier for a quick check. The Doc’s gonna be awake anyway.” Tony followed through Midnighter’s motion to turn the attempt to help into an hug. “Oh, great.”

“He’s like an octopus,” Apollo smiled, and made no move to help Midnighter disentangle himself from the other man. “A tiny murderous octopus. I can see why the two of you are such close friends, now.”

“Get him off me!“

Matt snapped a picture. Apollo sent him a look, a silent request, and felt his own phone beep with a notification just a few seconds later. “I just hate that I can’t add these to the article,” he was complaining. “The two of you couldn’t have put on your suits before coming here?”

“You said he was being thrown into a wall! Repeatedly!”

“So? Now all the pictures show you in your civvies and I can’t post them without divulging info to all your enemies!”

“We don’t really bother much with secrecy nowadays,” Apollo offered. “I have no issues with you posting them, if you want. Just make sure it’s not noticeable that my pants have a hole in the leg.” He smiled and scratched the back of his neck. “They’re my comfort pants.“

“Hoof, bad day?”

“Who did it?!” Tony growled, finally pulling off Midnighter. He turned toward Apollo with his trunk but not with his feet, and all but crashed into his chest. Apollo generously held him up at the waist, and Tony poked him with a finger. “Listen. Andrew. You. You beautiful...big...man. You are my man’s man. If anyone hurt you, I will fuck ‘em—”

“No, you won’t,” Midnighter groaned. “You’d get your ass kicked. Again.“

“I appreciate the sentiment, Tony, but I'm fine. It was just our day off. Thank you anyway.”

Matt finally turned off his phone and looked at them. “Did you three enter a polyamorous relationship without telling me? That’s rude.“

“I don’t have ta romance him to fucking love my man!”

Midnighter pinched the bridge of his nose between two fingers. “Let’s just get you to the Carrier, okay? We left Marina to keep an eye on Jenny and she's got work early tomorrow.”

“Why was Marina at the Carrier?”

“The official story is she came over for dinner with the others and then didn't want to bother going back home for the night.” Apollo winked.” Pretty sure she slept into Shen’s room though.”

Matt's smile widened deviously. “Oh. My. G-” 

“So sorry, ladies, am I interrupting the crocheting club? We have a _concussed person here_.“

Matt scoffed and rolled his eyes, but waved a hand around, to the upturned local, to let them know he’d take take of trying to straighten up as much as possible. Apollo thanked him openly as Midnighter muttered something vaguely grateful under his breath, then they called a Door and few seconds later they were gone for good.

Without the bright and loud presences of the heroes, the trashed place looked just downright depressing and lonely. Smashed lights, shards of glasses everywhere, alcohol in pools on the floor, Matt had seen it all before. It happened to almost all gay clubs, at some point. 

He took a deep breath, then set off to find a broom in that hell-scape Tony called a closet.

Apollo knew all the temperatures and steeping times of an whole lot of different kinds of tea, though not out of some particular fondness for the beverage. Living the life they did and with a husband and a daughter like his, he very much _needed_ coffee every so often M had informed him so much caffeine would kill a normal human. He’d flipped the man off and took another sip of his dark addiction.

Coffee was relax. Tea was training.

He had done finesse exercises all his life, ever since his very first days with Bendix, of course. A creature such like him was of no use on the battlefield if it could not control itself. He’d completed every task to excellence before moving on the next, training on precision of the hits, strength of them, speed. Temperature had been only roughly tackled in big chunks: to torture, to kill, to destroy layers and layers of steel and ground and flesh and bones.

He’d started working seriously on lighter intensities when he and M had run away, focusing on lightening himself up just enough to protect his lover from the cold without scorching him. Midnighter hadn’t needed it, but Apollo hadn’t cared. Anything to make it easier, to carve a bubble of safety and contentedness for them both.

Then along had come Jenny, and Apollo, well. He was big enough to admit, he’d been freaking out. She was so terrifically small right out of the hospital, she could have fit into a single of his hands. He held her like he would cup some water to drink, painfully aware in every inch of second that a single distraction and he might have snapped her in half like a twig.

Midnighter had shared much the same fears, which meant they had managed to fight them together, at least. But Midnighter didn’t risk boiling her up if he had a nightmare as she slept in their bed, so Apollo had worked on it.

Tea, he’d practiced with. So many cups he’d heated up striving to get to those exact degrees, careful of heating them slowing so as to not make the cup explode and then gentle in keeping the temperature stable for the allotted time internet informed him was best for this particular quality.

He’d driven most of their friends crazy, but he’d mastered the skill to a fraction of degree, and he’d slept much easier while cuddling his family.

He held the infuse of birch and chamomile in one hand and he walked back to his bedroom to rest the other on his husband’s hip and pull him gently against his chest. Midnighter grumbled, but came easily.

He was watching outside their windows, as if the Bleed had ever offered anything but endless twirls of red and as if all that colour had helped any with the nightmares. At the very least, he was wearing the soft cotton t-shirt and boxers he wore for bed. Apollo made a quick sweep of the room with his x-ray vision and found the stained clothes he’d been wearing at Tony’s crumbled in the trashcan.

_That bad, uh._

He raised the cup a bit in offering. “It’s your favourite. With just a dash of honey.”

Midnighter crossed an arm around his stomach to entwine his fingers with those Apollo had on his hip, before catching the cup with the other hand. The way he sipped on it betrayed how far away he was with his mind, too harried to properly savour the taste. 

Apollo sighed and rested his chin on his husband’s shoulder. “Wanna talk about it?”

It wasn’t really a suggestion. They had gotten really good at that communication thing as the years went by, and the sentence was more of a ritual expression to signal that anything from that point onward was to be taken with utmost seriousness and treated accordingly, with no judgement. 

Their reflection was a single tangle of limbs and hairs, burly muscles and masculine lines resting against each others like the support beams of a rooftop, holding each others up and keeping the rain out.

Midnighter gritted his teeth. “He hurt Tony because of me.”

“He hurt Tony because he's an asshole,” Apollo corrected immediately. His eyes failed to meet the others’ in the glass. “Love, please. We've both played this game for long enough to know that taking the blame for our supervillains’ actions doesn't make it any easier. They do awful things and we stop them; that's how it works.”

“Except that Prometheus’ tech blindsides me every fucking time,” Midnighter growled and tried to pull out of the embrace. It was an half-assed attempt at best, though, so Apollo held firm and Midnigher moved just a quarter of a turn, barely enough to face his husband. “I can't ever fucking _see_ him, Apollo. What if Matt didn’t manage to call? What if-”

“We would have saved them anyway.” 

There was no doubt in Apollo’s mind of that. He almost added that it was the normality for everyone, not to foresee a foe’s actions, but Midnighter had had the computer in his head for as much as he could remember, his whole life almost, and it would have been just cruel to point it out. Just because he was used to working blind, it didn’t make Prometheus any less of a finely tailored weakness in Midnighter’s heel. 

So, instead, he stole a rapid kiss. “Hate to break it to you, honey, but we're damn good at our job, and Prometheus is just an oversized bully.” Another peck, on the cheek this time. “And even if your computer doesn't work on him, you're not fighting him alone.” Third, on the temple. “You're never fighting him alone again.”

He laid his forehead against M’s and watched with childish glee as the man’s lips pulled into a reluctantly amused smirk. “Because I got you?”

“Well, me _and Tony_ , apparently.”

Midnighter dislodged him from his rest with how sharply he threw his head back and groaned. It was such a familiar gesture Apollo just giggled and let him turn back into his arms like an offended cat, only lacking some hissing to complete the picture. Once he was contentedly snuggled in his husband’s chest, Apollo bent forward to lay a kiss against the back of his neck.

His husband. huffed at the gesture. “What?”

Apollo giggled again. “You've got _friends_.”

“Oh please, don't-”

“ _Good_ friends!”

“You knew I have friends! You've met them all!”

“I know! Still.” Feeling giddy, Apollo kissed his neck again, and sneaked away with nibbling on the skin for a second. “I love to watch you with them,” he admitted, cutting off any reprimand about unnecessarily provoking the computer. “You all care for each others so much and when these things happen… Well, I am sorry for Tony, of course I am, don't get me wrong! But it makes me feel… better.”

“Better?”

“About the future. About you and what would happen if-”

“No.”

Apollo rolled his eyes, making sure the gesture was blatant enough to be visible in the reflection. “M-”

“No,” Midnighter growled. This time, when he pulled out, it was with strength enough that Apollo knew to let him go. M put his cup down on the dresser beside them and stood tall in front of him, shoulders squared as if ready for a fight. Probably, Apollo thought bitterly about all the scenarios that could be running in the computer, he was. “Fucking no, Andrew. You're not dying on me.””

“I did once already,” he tried to point it out gently. “It's a risk of the job and you know it.”

“I know you're not allowed to.”

“Not all-” Apollo choked on a laugh. “Says who? You?”

Midnighter lifted his chin defiantly. “The law. It's illegal to leave me without you.”

It was the most absurd thing he could have said, and Apollo couldn’t help but laugh, and just like that all the dark thoughts were banished from the room. Not many things fought the Midnighter and made it out alive, indeed.

“If you say so,” he found himself relenting.

Midnighter grabbed him by the waist not too gently and pulled him flush. “I do.”

Apollo rolled his eyes. He tried to stay on topic, but he couldn’t deny the flush of attention that went to his crotch at the warm contact. “I'm not saying I want to get killed off, alright? Just, you know, that I feel better knowing the Authority and I are not the only support you have.” Midnighter’s mouth came half an inch from his, making him go cross-eyed. “Just that.”

Midnighter scoffed. “Well, you might just as well remain the only ones if my friends insist on getting themselves on the fucking line of fire.“

“They're not so bad.”

“Marina works for _Spiral_.”

“So, maybe you have a type,” Apollo shrugged. “In friends.”

“Sure I do: _dumbass likes to risk life unnecessarily._ That's my friend type.”

“Angie isn't a dumbass who risks her life unnecessarily.”

“Angie’s not my friend. She's your friend and I tolerate her for you.”

Apollo pulled suddenly back, though not much, with mock offence. “Hey! You two spent three hours bitching about Jack just yesterday!”

“That's because Jack is the one thing we have in common and he's an asshole.”

“Takes one to know one I guess.”

“Fuck you too, love.”

Instead of trying to pull him in again, Midnighter fell forward on Apollo’s lips, far more hungrily than any kiss they’d shared since Matt’s call. He devoured his husband’s mouth like he’d die if he went another second apart from it, and he ran his hands through his hair to the roots to cling to them.

Apollo held him by the thighs and lifted him without effort, flushing them closer yet. Midnighter wrapped his legs around his waist and sighed at the friction. “Jenny asleep?”

“So Marina says.”

“That ain’t fucking reassuring.“

“ _M_.”

Midnighter grinned. He bent his neck and Apollo choked a curse as he felt teeth clamp not to gently on the side of his neck. “Get us to the fucking bedroom, then, asshole.”

Apollo did.

He didn’t exactly threw M on the bed since he launched himself as well, but he pinned him under his bulk and grabbed his jaw with a hand. Midnighter’s heartbeat sped up immediately, and he held his breath. 

“This goes both ways,“ Apollo warned. “You’re not allowed to leave me again either.”

“Never.” It was all but a pant. A desperate, breathless promise, not less binding than a blood oath. “Never again.”

Apollo hummed and kissed with deeply without letting go. “ _Good_.”

He only took the time to slip Midnigher’s boxers off his legs because they’d already thrown out a pair tonight and breaking another would leave them annoying lacking in comfortable wear, come morning.

Midnighter woke up feeling blissfully alone in his own brain, which only happened when the computer was rebooting after a hard head hit or whenever Apollo fucked his brains out of him. There was another body curled warming up his back, a thick arm on his hip and a thicker thigh between his. 

He let out a deep, content sigh and was rewarded with a chuckle in response, straight to his ear. The effect of that gust of breath against the skin of his neck was an immediate shiver going down his spine and something else twitching to come up.

He hated himself a bit for swatting Apollo’s hand away when it reached to tug him to full hardness. With some difficulties and a great deal of drawling, he managed, “gotta check on Tony.

Apollo huffed. “Doc made pancakes for everyone. From the way he’s tearing into them, I’d wager Tony’s feeling much better today.” Midnighter smiled as he felt a kiss lay gently on his hair. “We can take another twenty minutes.“

He hummed. “Jenny?”

“Deeply engrossed in Tony’s recounting of his valorous defence of your reputation. We’re going to have to talk her out of some ideas she’s getting about being allowed to jump in the fray of things when powerless, but she’s fine otherwise.“

Well. Damn, then.

Midnighter rolled on his back first, and then over Apollo’s chest. His husband went meekly. 

His muscles woke up groggily as he sat up, hands spread on Apollo’s pectorals. He grabbed and tweaked at the nipples a bit as he moved up and down on the man’s lap to get both their dicks some teasing contact. “Nothing fancy,” he warned. “I want to go down and give that idiot a piece of mind.”

Apollo rolled his eyes, but grabbed their cocks in one hand with more eagerness than fine technique. “Spoilsport.”

“Something’s gonna get spoilt, I’ll agree on that.”

“You’re the _worst_.”

Midnighter smirked. Apollo made sure to tug the smugness out of his face, moan and plead and curse after moan and plead and curse.

“Never. Again. Say it.”

“No.”

“Fuck’s sake, Tony!”

“Your ex shows his ugly face in my place again, I’mma shot that shitty mouth straight off it. I don’t care about nothing.”

Midnighter coloured a slight shade of red, just enough to prompt Apollo into putting a hand on his back in a placating caress. ”We’re just worried about you, Tony,” he offered. “Prometheus is a nuisance; leave him to us.”

“But-”

“Where else is Midnighter going to go to drink beer, play pool and make a bother of himself, if you get killed off?” huffed Doc. “We don’t want him here on the Carrier.”

“He’s a sore winner,” Shen smirked.

Tony giggled. “He’s an asshole like that. People only still play him to see him pull off all those unbelievable shots.”

“Shots for which I’m going to need a pool stick. How am I gonna do if you keep smashing them on that the head of everyone who’s ever tried to kill me?”

“There’s not enough sticks in the world for that.”

“Fuck you, Hawksmoor.“

Apollo ignored them, too used to their antics, and pulled his phone out to show it to Tony, instead. “Matt texted me a picture of the place after he and some friends of his finished cleaning what was possible. Here’s the results.” The situation didn’t look too bad without debris and in the light of day, to be honest. “Angie and Doc will take care of the things that are still to be fixed.“

The power surge Prometheus created had caused the most damage, which meant a high bill for new lightbulbs and fridges, and other than that just a couple tables would have to be replaced. Sure, there was also a hole in the parquet from where Midnighter had driven the asshole through the floor, but overall it was nothing that nanites and magic couldn’t take care of in a couple hours.

Tony took a long look at his place, quiet, then he nodded. “Thanks, Andrew.”

“That’s mushy. Can we go now?,” Marina piped in, swallowing the last bite of her fourth pancake. Jenny sitting in her lap, giggled happily at the faces she made trying to clean away the thin smears of syrup around her mouth. “Helena’s going to have my head if I come in late.”

“You mean, _again_?”

“Don’t make me cuss at you, I’ve got a child on my lap.“

“That is _my_ child, actually.” Apollo couldn’t help the smile on his lips, or the thrill down his spine, as he watched Midnighter march up to Marina and effortlessly and expertly pick up Jenny to balance her on a hip. The baby, on her part, laughed loudly and smacked her hand on his cheek a few times. “Come on, baby girl. I don’t want you to catch her bad judgment.”

“Every so often, I regret ever meeting you.”

Tony shook his head at them. He looked up to Apollo and gestured vaguely in the direction of the bickering. “You chose this.”

Apollo smiled back. “Looks like so did you.“

**Author's Note:**

> GIVE ME MORE MIDPOLLO WITH A WORKING, HEALTHY FAMILY AND NETWORK SUPPORT.
> 
> I, much like Apollo, am very weak to people loving M.


End file.
